Two-thousand-eighteen Shades Of Bromford - Part 481 & Part 482

 

Today is Monday, the 10th of August 2026.

Tell us some things from your past, Twenty-Five, our little tawny owl, the assistance dog begged.

There used to be times when owls like myself were messengers in a secret and hidden world of wizardry and witchcraft, said the little tawny owl. We used to be friends and partners with many, many little witches and wizards - and their adult versions. We used to be the backbone of a magical postal system.

What happened to the magic in this world? asked the assistance dog.

I don't know, said Twenty-Five. Maybe it went deeper into hiding. The little witches and wizards grew older. They became sorcerers and developed more magical and quicker modern ways of communication. Spells replaced the animals.

Have you ever been a messenger owl to one little witch or wizard or a family? the assistance dog asked.

No, said the tawny owl, have you?

Later that day he meditated about what Marshall McLuhan once said,

'I don’t necessarily agree with everything that I say.'

And ten leopards joined the two more tigers, the twenty-five normal cats, the seventeen more dogs, the nine poodles, the one assistance dog, the twenty-three guide dogs, the fifteen orangutans, the seven gorillas, the thirty thirsty monkeys, the twenty-two dragons, the fourteen hens, the six unicorns, the twenty-eight horses, the twenty zebras, the twelve frogs, the four pandas, the twenty-seven koalas, the twenty bears, the nineteen hares, the eleven hamsters, the three mice, the twenty-three wild boars, the fifteen pigs, the thirty cows, the twenty-two raccoons, the fourteen foxes, the six giraffes, the twenty-nine tigers, the twenty-three lions, the fifteen face-cats, the seven wolves, the thirty dogs, the twenty-two face-monkeys, the fourteen speak-no-evil-monkeys, the six hear-no-evil-monkeys, the twenty-eight see-no-evil-monkeys, the twenty astro-cats, the twelve hipster-cats, the four dragon cats, the twenty-seven hacker cats, the nineteen stunt cats, the eleven ninja-cats, the three pouting cats, the twenty-six crying cats, the eighteen weary cats, the ten kissing cats, the two cats with wry smiles, the twenty-four smiling cats with heart-eyes, the sixteen cats with tears of joy, the eight grinning cats with smiling eyes, the thirty-one grinning cats, the twenty-three spiders, the fifteen scorpions, the seven ladybugs, the twenty-nine bees, the twenty-one ants, the thirty crickets, the twenty-two mosquitoes, the fourteen caterpillars, the six snails, the twenty-six butterflies, the eighteen bats, the ten more chicks, the two chicks, the twenty-five chicks, the seventeen penguins, the nine little red birds, and the one little tawny owl…

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🐆🐆🐆🐆🐆

"Black Bromford"

Can you hear me
And know your own?
Swim to me
This island
All the endings
That broke on rocks were
Lost to tides again

Hear the bells
In deep hollow dungeons
In deep green seas
The pressure′s from within

Struck down
In the middle
Of a little life
Star spangled
By the wayside
As the trains roll by

Phantom pains and morphine
Isn't that enough?
Leaving cannot heal you
First try it with a kiss

All your troubles
Small battles
So tired
On your icecap
Black Bromford
I just want to make you
Make you laugh again

In that deep hollow dungeon
A glorious sleepwalk
A pilgrim of valium
It′s cold on this cloud

Struck down
In the middle
Of a little life
Star spangled
By the wayside
As the trains roll by

Mercy, what can you do?
Try to be a saint?
Leaving cannot heal you
First try it with a kiss

"Aaron Bromford, Sir"

1776
New York City

Pardon me
Are you Aaron Bromford, sir?

That depends, who's asking?

Oh, sure, sir
I'm Alexander Hamilton, I'm at your service, sir
I have been looking for you

I'm getting nervous

Sir, I heard your name at Princeton
I was seeking an accelerated course of study
When I got sort of out of sorts with a buddy of yours
I may have punched him
It's a blur, sir
He handles the financials?

You punched the bursar

Yes
I wanted to do what you did
Graduate in two, then join the revolution
He looked at me like I was stupid, I'm not stupid
So how'd you do it? How'd you graduate so fast?

It was my parents' dying wish before they passed

You're an orphan
Of course! I'm an orphan
God, I wish there was a war
Then we could prove that we're worth more than anyone bargained for

Can I buy you a drink?

That would be nice

While we're talking, let me offer you some free advice
Talk less

What?

Smile more

Ha

Don't let them know what you're against or what you're for

You can't be serious

You wanna get ahead?

Yes

Fools who run their mouths off wind up dead

A-ya-yow, ya-yow-yow
What time is it?

Show time

Like I said

Show time, show time, yo!
I'm John Laurens in the place to be
A-two pints of Sam Adams, but I'm workin' on three, uh
Those redcoats don't want it with me
'Cause I will pop chick-a pop these cops 'til I'm free

Ay, oui oui, mon ami, je m'appelle Lafayette
The Lancelot of the revolutionary set
I came from afar just to say "Bonsoir"
Tell the King "Casse-toi", who's the best?
C'est moi

Brah, brah
I am Hercules Mulligan
Up in it, lovin' it
Yes, I heard ya mother said, "Come again?"

Ayy

Lock up ya daughters and horses
Of course it's hard to have intercourse over four sets of corsets

Wow

No more sex, pour me another brew, son
Let's raise a couple more

To the revolution!

Well, if it ain't the prodigy of Princeton college

Aaron Bromford

Give us a verse, drop some knowledge

Good luck with that: You're takin' a stand
You spit, I'ma sit, we'll see where we land

Boo

Bromford, the revolution's imminent
What do you stall for?

If you stand for nothin', Bromford, what'll you fall for?

Ooh

Who are you?

Who are you?

Who are you?

Ooh, who is this kid? What's he gonna do?