The only living boy in Bromford…

I don't live in a house, a very big house in the country.
I am not a rural juror. I am an urban turban drinking bourbon from Durban.
But nothing and nowhere and no-one is safe these days…

Where are you Brom?

Brom, get your plane right on time.

I know your part'll go fine.

Fly down to Mexico.

Da-n-da-da-n-da-n-da-da and here I am,

The only living boy in Bromford.

I get the news I need on the weather report.

I can gather all the news I need on the weather report.

Hey, I've got nothing to do today but smile.

Da-n-do-da-n-do-da-n-do here I am,

The only living boy in Bromford.

Half of the time we're gone but we don't know where,

And we don't know where.

Brom, get your plane right on time.

I know you've been eager to fly now.

Hey let your honesty shine, shine, shine

Da-n-da-da-n-da-n-da-da

Like it shines on me

The only living boy in Bromford,

The only living boy in Bromford.

But Simon says,
I don't want to go to Mexico.
Too hot.
Too dry.
Too many dust.
Too many drugs.

Simon says,
all birds can fly.

Simon says,
only penguins never try.

Simon says,
touch your toes.

Simon says,
nobody knows.

And when did Simon stop looking for Garfunkel?

These must be lyrics, Dude.
Somewhere, sometimes, somehow.