Like Ice in the Sunshine…

Today is Monday, the 7th of January 2019.

Kylie is calling from Florida. I could have sworn we have been to Florida before, the llama says. No, Kylie replies, we have been to the other sunshine state of the United States lately. We have been to Hawaii. Do you remember? Mr Mojo Rising? The King and all his companions? King George, the llama asks. Kylie is humming a toneless tune. Can you buy me one of those Florida shirts, the llama asks. Kylie does not know what the animal is talking about. Do you not remember those colourfull shirts with short arms and designs with flowers and palm trees and so on, the llama asks. This private eye from the eighties with the chest hair and the mustache used to wear them. I want a shirt like that and two four-legged companions called Zeus and Apollo. And I want a Magnum Popsicle with extra thick chocolate crust. And I want a surfboard. And I want a Higgins, whatever that may be. You can almost hear Kylie shake her head through the phone. We are in Tallahassee, Florida, animal. This is the home of old folks and pensioners, of aligators and crocodiles, of flamingos and bottlenose dolphins. All right, the llama says, and they all wear beige, right? And they eat Cuban food. I don't know where you have got those images from, but if you wish, Kylie says. The hairy man with the colourfull shirts you were talking about is Thomas Magnum, a private investigator from a TV series from the nineteen-eighties. This was also set on Hawaii and not in Florida. Wait a minute, the llama says. Is Miami a place in Florida? Yes, Kylie says, now you are on the right way. OK, I will need some strong black trash bags and a white boat and some sharp knives now. Why, for heaven's sake, Kylie asks. Because, the llama tells her, I am a forensic technician specialized in blood spatter pattern analysis now. And I am a secret serial killer. But you can call me, Dexter, if you like. Fancy a doughnut, darling? Oh, my goodness, Kylie says. You have been watching too much TV lately. It is too humid here if you want my opinion, the llama says…