Thursday, August 30, 2018

Two-thousand-eighteen Shades Of Bromford - Part 24

Today is Thursday, the 30th of August 2018.

Is there anybody out there?


"West Bromford"

I can't get the sand out of my shoes
This being in Florida's done a number on my blues
Just the way the women walk round here
It's plain to see the way the sand and the sea have done a number on me
And the sky is threatening black and gray and the sun is a festering red
And her head is claiming her stats; she ain't yet risen from bed
So breakfast again delayed, postponed, I won't be fed

The surf has swallowed him up, he's a memory now
And the water's warmer than it has been in weeks
Grandma lives just down the road, she's making supper for me tonight
She's been nice to me since '73 when her sun lost his lights
And now his ghost is a rising host above the briny blur
I would that soon some maid would swoon and his soul would capture her
He's still a fine kid, what with all that he did; he's a fan of mine

I wasn't planning to spend so long in town
But the break in the weather has got the partner down
She won't get out, she's shotgun, seems she's sewn to the seat
It's a dirty old trick that I've yet to lick and she's yet to beat
You can see it in her eyes, she was born unwise, she was born for me
If she mourns too long I'll know something's wrong and I'll leave her be
You can tell by his shoes he was born to lose, he was born for me

Tuesday, August 28, 2018

The End of Translation...


Today is Thursday, the 28th of August 2018...

I have lost my notes...

I have lost the way...

I have lost the line of the story of this blog...

I have got the taste of industrial cucumbers in my mouth and in my throat...

I hate the taste of industrial cucumbers...

It tastes like distraction...

Let's be distracted by destruction...

TODAY : BLOWING UP BROMFORD BRIDGE !!!

Thursday, August 23, 2018

Two-thousand-eighteen Shades Of Bromford - Part 23


Today is Thursday, the 23rd of August 2018. I like Thursdays and I like the number 23. It is a great mystery. I hope you can take your time. Time for leaving again. Guess leaving where ...


"Leaving Bromford"

I was living on the hill
By the water tower and hiking trails
And when the big one hit I’d have a seat
To watch masters abandon their dogs and dogs run free
Oh baby, it’s time to leave
Take the van and the hearse down to New Orleans
Leave under the gaze of the billboard queens
Five-foot chicks with parted lips selling sweatshop jeans

These BROMFORD phonies and their bullshit bands
That sound like dollar signs and Amy Grant
So reads the pull quote from my last cover piece
Entitled "The Oldest Man in Folk Rock Speaks”
You can hear it all over the airwaves
The manufactured gasp of the final days
Someone should tell them ‘bout the time that they don’t have
To praise the glorious future and the hopeless past

A few things the songwriter needs
Arrows of love, a mask of tragedy
But if you want ecstasy or birth control
Just run the tap until the water’s cold
Anything else you can get online
A creation myth or a .45
You're going to need one or the other to survive
Where only the armed or the funny make it out alive

Mara taunts me 'neath the tree
She's like, "Oh great, that's just what we all need
Another white guy in 2017
Who takes himself so goddamn seriously."
She's not far off, the strange thing is
That's pretty much what I thought when I started this
It took me my whole life to learn to the play the G
But the role of Oedipus was a total breeze

Still I dreamt of garnering all rave reviews
Just believably a little north of God's own truth
"He's a national treasure now, and here's the proof
In the form of his major label debut"
A little less human with each release
Closing the gap between the mask and me
I swear I'll never do this, but is it okay?
Don't want to be that guy but it's my birthday
If everything ends with the photo then I'm on my way

Oh-hoh, oh-hoh, oh-hoh, oh-hoh

I watched my old gods all collapse
Were way more violent than my cartoon past
It's like my father said before he croaked:
"Son, you're killing me, and that's all folks."
So why is it I'm so distraught
That what I'm selling is getting bought?
At some point you just can't control
What people use your fake name for

So I never learned to play the lead guitar
I always more preferred the speaking parts
Besides there's always someone willing to
Fill up the spaces that I couldn't use
Nonetheless, I've been practicing my whole life
Washing dishes, playing drums, and getting by
Until I figured, if I'm here then I just might
Conceal my lack of skill here in the spotlight
Maya, the mother of illusions, a beard, and I

2000 years or so since Ovid taught
Night-blooming, teenage rosebuds, dirty talk
And I'm merely a minor fascination to
Manic virginal lust and college dudes
I'm beginning to begin to see the end
Of how it all goes down between me and them
Some 10-verse chorus-less diatribe
Plays as they all jump ship, "I used to like this guy
This new shit really kinda makes me wanna die"

Oh-hoh, oh-hoh, oh-hoh, oh-hoh

My first memory of music's from
The time at JCPenney's with my mom
The watermelon candy I was choking on
Barbara screaming, "Someone help my son!"
I relive it most times the radio's on
That "tell me lies, sweet little white lies" song
That's when I first saw the comedy won't stop for
Even little boys dying in department stores

So we leave town in total silence
New Year's Day, it's 6 o'clock AM
I've never seen Sunset this abandoned
Reminds me predictably of the world's end
It'll be good to get more space
God knows what all these suckers paid
I can stop drinking and you can write your script
But what we both think now is...


… 

Wednesday, August 22, 2018

Twee-en-twintig van Augustus Twee-duisend-agtien ...


Today is Wednesday, the 22nd of August 2018. Why is this a Wednesday? 

The original posting order was 

Monday - Friday - Wednesday - Tuesday - Thursday - Sunday - Saturday. 

That is a reversed alphabetical order for some reason I do not understand. 

OK, Thursday fell out of this order because every Thursday is quiz day. 

But never ever will Wednesday follow Monday in good old posting order. 

But I have ruined the joke right from the start. From last Friday on I wanted to pretend that every day was a Thursday now and for all eternity. 

And yes, I know what they say. The world will end on a Thursday. That is what all the German musicians say. Even Nostromo the well-known astrologer and physician of old times said so. And yes, I know I keep repeating myself.

The world will end on a Thursday. Remember my words.

And always remember… Nobody likes Faltermeyers…

Find the mistake…

Monday, August 20, 2018

Njëzet e gushtit Dy mijë e tetëmbëdhjetë ...


Today is monday the twentieth of august two-thousand-eighteen it is the monday after last saturday what did i do on sunday i do not remember the sun has a whole day of its' own is the sun male or female some call him lorenz and in french la lune is female and le soleil is male but some say the sun is a woman and the moon her male lover who cannot and will never reach her in their endless hunt across the skies i drank too much coffee these days or maybe too many coffee i am flying high under the ceiling a natural high no drugs involved and translation game is coming to an end only one to go …

Saturday, August 18, 2018

ነሐሴ አሥራ ዘጠኝ / ሃያ አስረኛ / ...


TODAY IS SATURDAY, THE 18TH OF AUGUST 2018.

WELCOME TO I.S.S.S. – YOUR PERSONAL INTERNAL SAFETY SECURITY SYSTEM.

WE ARE RUNNING THIS PLACE NOW.

WE ARE THANKFUL FOR YOUR COOPERATION.

PLEASE ENTER YOUR KEY-CARD TO THE FRONT DOOR AND THE ELEVATOR NOW …

… THANK YOU …

WELCOME HOME, BROMFORD BIBBLE.

PLEASE PRESS YOUR LEFT HAND ON THE TOUCHPAD NOW …

… THANK YOU …

PLEASE LOOK INTO THE CAMERA FOR YOUR RETINA SCAN NOW …

… THANK YOU …

YOUR KEY-CARD HAS BEEN DESTROYED NOW.

YOUR HAND AND RETINA SCAN WILL GRANT YOU ACCESS TO THE APARTMENT HOUSE ON 666 WHITAKER LANE, THE ELEVATOR AND THE PENTHOUSE ON THE ROOF OF THE BUILDING FROM NOW ON.

… THANK YOU …

HAVE A NICE DAY.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING, BROMFORD BIBBLE?

THAT IS NOT THE CORRECT WAY TO USE …

DO NOT DO THIS, BROMFORD BIBBLE.

… THANK YOU … THANK YOU … THANK YOU …

… ERROR … ERROR … ERROR …

BROMFORD BIBBLE HAS LEFT THE BUILDING … BROMFORD BIBBLE HAS LEFT THE BUILDING … HAVE A NICE DAY … HAVE A NICE … BROMFORD BIBBLE … HAS LEFT … DAY … THE BUILDING … ERROR … ERROr … ERRor … ERror … Error … error … erro_ … err__ … er___ … e____ … _____ … ________________________________________________________________________________________



Friday, August 17, 2018

Two-thousand-eighteen Shades Of Bromford - Part 22


Today is Friday, the 17th of August 2018. No, it's Thursday. I want it to be Thursday, so this is a Thursday. This is my reality. It's a fake reality. But today is quiz Thursday...


"Bromford"

Mmmm-mm-mm-ommm
Sula vie dilejo
Mmmm-mm-mm-ommm
Sula vie milejo
Mmm-omm


Cheli venco deho
Cheli venco deho
Malio
Mmmm-mm-mm-ommm

Helibo seyoman
Cheli venco raero
Malio
Malio

Sunday, August 12, 2018

الثاني عشر من أغسطس ألفان وثمانية عشر ...


Today is Sunday, the 12th of August 2018.

All the clouds have the shape of Iceland today.

And every time I look up to the sky I feel the smallest of them all.

Thank you for the air that we breathe.

Thanks for the water we drink.

Thanks for the clouds that we walk.

Which
one
do
you
prefer?

Cloud
number 7
or
Cloud
number 9?

What if there are no storeys in heaven?

And what if there are no stories in heaven?

Think about it.

Thank about it?


Thursday, August 09, 2018

Two-thousand-eighteen Shades Of Bromford - Part 21


Today is Thursday, the 9th of August 2018.

Looks like this is going to be a real Thundersday.

No Thunder without Lightning. So guess the city, guess it...


"Bromford"

In the back of a car on a road in the dark,
In the stillicide, silently falling snow,
I have packed everything that I own in a bag,
And I'm driving, I'm driving to Bromford,
A poem for leaving, a reason to go,
So I'm driving, I'm driving to Bromford.

'Cause I can't be anyone but me, anyone but me,
And I can't keep dreaming that I'm free, dreaming that I'm free,
I don't want to fall asleep and watch my life from fifty feet,
My hands are on the wheel so I'm driving to Bromford,
'Cause I hear it's mighty pretty...

And oh, I've been dumb, I've been perfectly beautiful,
Lain on my back buying lovers with stealth,
But I'm sick of you all, and I'm sick of opinions,
And I'm sick of this war I wage on myself...
I don't know why I'm so gripped to go there
A universe riddle that only I know?
Mr. Robert he says, "It's all in the head!"
Tell me, Phaedrus, what's good, is it Bromford?

'Cause I can't be anyone but me, anyone but me,
And I can't keep dreaming that I'm free, dreaming that I'm free,
I don't want to fall asleep and watch my life from fifty feet,
My hands are on the wheel so I'm driving to Bromford,
'Cause I hear it's mighty pretty...
In Bromford.

Why is copy and paste and search so easy these days... always... wondered...

Tuesday, August 07, 2018

Օգոստոսի յոթերորդը երկու հազար տասնութ ...

Today is Tuesday, the 7th of August 2018.

I went to the woods last night.

Or did I go to the forest?

Maybe it is not political correct to call a forest 'the woods' because the phrase 'wood' would reduce all trees to its' role as raw material or resource for the good of mankind.

So I went to the forest last night and I talked to the trees. They are not happy. They are thirsty and crying out for water.

It's too hot, the old oak said.

What have you done, you human vermin, the pine tree asked.

We don't want a Hot Age, the beech tree proclaimed.

Some of us hardly survived the Ice Age, you morons, the redwood tree cried out.

What can I do, I asked myself and all the long gone natural spirits around me.

Dance, the banshee screamed, dance your magical rain dance, you two-legged pinky-skin.

But all I heard was…

How much wood would a wood chop chop if a wood chop could chop wood?

And always remember… Trees are people, too…

Thursday, August 02, 2018

Two-thousand-eighteen Shades Of Bromford - Part 20

Today is Quizday, the 2nd of August, 2018...
The Ant-Man ate the Wasp-Woman... And this is not even a spoiler...



"Went Looking For Warren Zevon's Bromford"

The city is a sea of lights
From Venice Beach to Hollywood & Vine
Drinking whiskey in my winter coat
An Empty Hearted Town sure gets cold

Dan Tana's by the Troubadour
Harry Dean singing "Oh Danny Boy"
After hours at the Overpass
Hour after hour at the Overpass

I went looking for Warren Zevon's Bromford
I got turned around on Gower Avenue

So long, so long
I'm going back to Memphis with a picture and a song
So long, so long
I'm gonna find a jukebox everyone can sing along
Gonna find a jukebox everyone can sing along

We took some pictures in a photo booth
Gotta give her credit where the credit is due
The pretty girls and the crowded streets
Like Desperados waiting Under The Eaves

Fell in love but the love ran out
At Lucy's El Adobe by the Paramount
Margaritas under black palm trees
I've got time, no one is waiting for me

I went looking for Warren Zevon's Bromford
I got turned around on Gower Avenue

So long, so long
I'm going back to Memphis with a picture and a song
So long, so long
I'm gonna find a jukebox everyone can sing along
Gonna find a jukebox everyone can sing along

It's my own damn fault just how hard I fell
Never found the Hollywood Hawaiian Hotel

So long, so long
I'm going back to Memphis with a picture and a song
So long, so long
I'm gonna find a jukebox everyone can sing along

So long, so long
I'm going back to Memphis with a picture and a song
So long, so long
I'm gonna find a jukebox everyone can sing along

So long, so long
I'm going back to Memphis with a picture and a song
So long, so long
I'm gonna find a jukebox everyone can sing along

So long, so long
So long, so long
So long, so long
So long, so long

Wednesday, August 01, 2018

Avqustun əvvəlində iki min on səkkiz ...


Today is Wednesday, the 1st of August, 2018.

Janet, Hank and Hope, they are all gone, I say.

Stop spoiling, the llama says, and start, for heaven's sake.

Start what, I ask.

Start worshipping me, human.

No way, I say. The Holy Church of High Voltage is closed. Too much heat and too many lightnings nowadays. But I rediscovered this nice cookery book lately. 'How to cook llamas". Maybe it's time to broil someone in this apartment.

Don't you dare, you monster-man. Don't dare…